she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
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