Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
Randomize