if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Randomize