The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
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I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
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"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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