And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
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