...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
And then my night got REAL pukey
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
Randomize