I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Randomize