I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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