I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Randomize