Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
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