Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize