Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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