ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
My friends, they love my intelligence
We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
Randomize