bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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