He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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