just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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