I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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