am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
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