these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
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