When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
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