So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
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