Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I am spending my child support on dildos
I asked a girl to buy her a drink, she had I have a boyfriend, so I said, well i have a goldfish, she said what? I replied, oh I'm sorry I thought we were talking about shit that doesnt matter.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
I had to cum in my sink.
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