My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Randomize