so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
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