I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
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