I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
barbara walters just said penis...
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Randomize