Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Randomize