so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
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We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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