just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
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