It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Randomize