no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize