I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
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