Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize