I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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