He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
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I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
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