did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize