you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Randomize