if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
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