Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Randomize