oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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