Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize