He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
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