I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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