I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Randomize