I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
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she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
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Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
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