She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
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