Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
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