dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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