There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize