am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize